Praying, Sharing Humanity

Matterofprayer: A Year of Everyday Prayers – Saturday, October 13, 2018

Praying, Sharing Humanity

Compassion. That’s what today’s section of Henri Nouwen’s book With Open Hands is all about. Amazing insight with such brevity. Father Nouwen says such sensible things, I cannot believe they never crossed my mind before. Like, “Compassion grown with the inner recognition that your neighbor shares your humanity with you.” [1]

I cannot help but compare Father Nouwen’s words here with the basic outlook and principles behind Fred Rogers’ treatment and attitude towards everyone he dealt with. It did not matter what sort of person Mister Rogers met—age, height, ability, ethnicity, status (or lack of status), or any other kind of difference or separation. Those differences did not matter to Fred Rogers. I do not think those differences or separations mattered to Father Nouwen, either.

Fr. Nouwen clearly states “Across all barriers of land and language, wealth and poverty, knowledge and ignorance, we are one, created from the same dust, subject to the same laws, and destined for the same end.” [2] I don’t know how Fr. Nouwen was able to do that, but there was an equitable, caring, open attitude he had towards everyone he encountered, just as there was with Mister Rogers. That kind, caring attitude and openness are what I strive for, God willing.

Yet, compassion—according to Fr. Nouwen—is not only a positive, warm, fuzzy kind of expression and emotion. Compassion “also means sharing in joy, which can be just as important as sharing in pain.” [3]

Yes, we are human; yes, we all have the experience of pain. Some people experience pain more often than others. Yes, I have sat with individuals who go through painful episodes in their lives regularly. I know some have inner anguish, others have physical pain. Those painful emotions and situations did not make Fr. Nouwen care for those people less. Those negative experiences caused Mister Rogers to care even more for children and adults alike.

Dear God, when I grow up, I want to be like Fred Rogers. I want to have the attitude of Henri Nouwen. Help me—help us to offer others real support and comfort from our hearts. For real, not with false faces or fake feelings. Thank You for giving us such excellent examples as Henri Nouwen and Fred Rogers.

@chaplaineliza

 

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Why not visit my companion blogs, “the best of” A Year of Being Kind.  #PursuePEACE. My Facebook page, Pursuing Peace – Thanks! And, read my sermons from Pastor, Preacher Pray-er

[1] With Open Hands: Bring Prayer into Your Life, Henri J. M. Nouwen (United States of America: Ave Maria Press, 2005), 92.

[2] Ibid.

[3] Ibid, 93.

Calm Amidst the Storm, Praying

Matterofprayer: A Year of Everyday Prayers – Friday, January 6, 2017

 

Calm Amidst the Storm, Praying

As I was reading the slim book “How to Sit” this evening, I was struck by the analogy given. Of anxious people on board a boat, at sea, in the middle of a storm. And, one person’s calm demeanor became what calmed the whole boatload of passengers.

I don’t want to bend over backwards to pat myself on the back, but I have noticed that I am that person, sometimes. I have a calm, less-anxious presence, at times. (I’ve noticed this, and so have my former chaplain supervisors.) Whether in a health care setting, or a funeral home, or in a tense situation outside the church, sometimes I help to bring a bit of calmness and serenity into an anxious or awkward or scary or angry situation.

When I considered this attitude lifted up by the book earlier this evening, I did not pray all that much. Instead, I found myself reflecting on this kind of attitude. A calm, less-anxious kind of attitude. I really do thank God that I can be that person, sometimes. I know I have been trained as a chaplain, and trained to express that kind of attitude, but some of it is natural.

I am so glad I have gravitated to a line of work where I can express these kinds of attitudes and talents. I know I need to continue to keep my attitudes and actions sharp, and be certain of continuing to reach out in care and concern. God willing, those will be the kinds of things that others will help me in doing. I pray that some here will work with me, so we all can support each other. One day at a time. (God, thank You!)

@chaplaineliza

Like what you read? Disagree? Share your thoughts with your loved ones and continue the conversation.

Why not visit my companion blogs, “the best of” A Year of Being Kind.  #PursuePEACE. My Facebook page, Pursuing Peace – Thanks! And, read my sermons from Pastor, Preacher Pray-er

Pray for a Positive Attitude

Matterofprayer: A Year of Everyday Prayers – Saturday, January 23, 2016

Pray for a Positive Attitude

Is the glass half full? Or, half empty? Some people might even complain that their glass is cracked and that the water keeps leaking out. Having such a poisonous attitude has such a negative effect. I know.

Being around chronically negative people had a damaging effect on my formerly-positive attitude. Thank God, I am no longer in regular contact with someone like that, but I remember what kind of down-in-the-mouth effect that attitude had on me!

I can pray for God’s light to shine inside and out. Of me, that is. I can ask God to help me with relationships, and give me a glass-half-full kind of point of view. I’ve had enough with negativity in my life, relationships, and my work.

But, what if I have nasty things happen in my life? Things that cause anxiety, or frustration, or anger, or despair? What if I get a blasted sinus headache, or a dear loved one gets in a car accident, or if someone in my family gets terminal cancer or a massive stroke? What happens then?

I am feeling particularly involved, right now. So much to pray about. So much to be concerned about. Gracious God, dear Lord. Protect my loved ones. Guard all those I hold in my heart. Help all those who feel anxiety, fear, unquiet, rage, despair. Lord, let the peace that passes all understanding guard the hearts and minds of all those in need of a touch from You, right now. In Jesus’s precious, healing name we all pray, amen.

@chaplaineliza

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Why not visit my sister blogs, “the best of” A Year of Being Kind.   @chaplaineliza And, read my sermons from Pastor, Preacher Pray-er

Love? Connection with the Soul

Matterofprayer: A Year of Everyday Prayers – Sunday, June 7, 2015

Love? Connection with the Soul.

I appreciate Bernie Siegel’s chapter in the book Handbook for the Soul, in several different ways.

First, as clergy trained in chaplaincy, I understand what he’s talking about. From speaking to patients, their loved ones, and hospital staff, I have an appreciation that is much more of a reality check. Yes, so many have a renewed understanding that they have “today.” Just one more day. Today is the most important time, the best time. Not next week, and certainly not next year. Getting lost in anything other than “today” is not conducive to true joy.

Second, I relate because of my familiarity with the 12 Steps and the Recovery program. “One Day at a Time” is all important. As someone trained with a certificate in Alcohol and Drug Counseling, as well as many acquaintances involved with Recovery, I understand the concept that NOW is the most important time. The only time worth living.

Third, I agree with Dr. Siegel’s recommendation: change your attitude toward your life. (italics his) I am strongly reminded of a quote I saw several years ago that deeply moved me. It said, “Some people see the glass half empty. Others see it as half full. Be glad you have a glass.”

Dr. Siegel suggests: “. . . if you can’t change your external circumstances at this point, you can change your attitude toward your life. You can say, ‘All right, I choose to be happy. I choose to view what I do every day as a way of contributing love.’ When you go about your life with this attitude, you’ll find that your circumstances do begin to change.” [1]

And, each day is filled with choices. Little choices, larger decisions. Forks in the daily road. The Recovery program tells me to choose the next right thing. I would go that one better: I strive to do the next loving thing. This I see as closely linked to changing my attitude toward my life, exactly what Dr. Siegel tells us to do in this chapter. Otherwise, if the little, incremental choices I make day by day lead me down a path towards a person I do not want to be, what good is it? Do I really want to end up feeling awful, even if I see awful things at work? Even if someone confides awful things to me in confidence?

Yes, attitude is everything. God, I choose love. I choose the next loving thing.

@chaplaineliza

Like what you read? Disagree? Share your thoughts with your loved ones and continue the conversation.

Why not visit my sister blogs, “the best of” A Year of Being Kind.   @chaplaineliza And, read my sermons from Pastor, Preacher Pray-er .

[1] Handbook for the Soul, Richard Carlson and Benjamin Shield, editors. (Boston: Little, Brown & Co., 1995), 41.